07 November 2007

Leditor in the Arkansas Traveler

I haven't dropped writing altogether. I wrote a fantastically sarcastic letter to the university's student paper on Monday, which inspired two awesomely bad responses, one from a liberal and one from a conservative. Here's the letter I penned (or typed), which should have been titled "Young Democrats should sponsor Christofascism Awareness Week." Whatever.


Secularism the 'new black'

Alright impetuous young liberals, it's high time we band together to one-up those pesky NeoCons. If they think they can dish out a healthy serving of religious and cultural bigotry with all the trimmings and come out on top, then they've got another thing coming.

I propose an International Christofascism Awareness Week (nod to Abel) to commence Dec. 19, which would land our grand finale extravaganza right atop a lighted tree of that not-so-pagan-anymore holiday. Not only do we show the right that anything they can do we can do better, but we get to sock it to 'em in the tit-for-tat game of "your religion/creedo/latest trendy diet has perpetuated more mass violence than mine," which is obviously the best and easiest way to win any ideological clash.

Mutual understanding? Puh-lease. I hate to break it to you, the right, but Richard Dawkins, God bless him, effectively proved that anyone who holds religious beliefs is a loon.

Secularism is the new black; our left is right and your right is wrong, suckers. Remember those nasty Crusades, that politely titled Inquisition and a few crooked Holy Fathers to boot? The old-timey phrase that resembles something like "clean your own laundry before you start making fun of my dirty jeans" seems like an apt quote to insert here.

All things considered, International Christofascism Awareness Week, mid-to-late December: let's do this! And I heard Daniel Dennett is buying rounds on "Silent Night."

Chris Wylie
Junior
Middle East Studies




...and the responses in today's paper:


Insults and mocking not needed

Upon reading Chris Wylie's letter, encouraging the belief that all those who consider themselves liberal also consider themselves agnostic or atheist, I felt the need to respond to say otherwise.

First, by comparing liberal as the opposite of neo-conservative, Chris is making a political mistake. A liberal's opposite is a conservative, not a neo-conservative.

Second, one can be a liberal and still be a devout Christian; the two are not mutually exclusive. I have repeatedly voted the Democratic ticket and every Sunday do my best to read the Bible.

Last, its better to impress by actions and gestures, than by using insults and mocking. Perhaps Chris might realize how far he has stooped with the mocking if he wrote out his letter in chalk on a campus sidewalk.

xxxx xxxxx
First-Year Student
Law



Wylie uninformed
(*note: could this title be any more perfect? I submit that it could not).

I'm all for an open discussion on the left vs. right discourse, but I thought the Traveler encouraged informed, intellectual arguments. There was nothing informed or intellectual about Chris Wylie's hate-filled screed "Secularism is the 'new black.'"

Wait, what I am saying? Of course the crackpot Richard Dawkins single-handedly proved the idiocy of religion. And conjuring ages-old infringements of the church like the Crusades and the Inquisition? A brilliant move.

Wylie's letter (if it is even serious) is further proof of the cynicism and arrogance that have become characteristic of some members of the left. Note how I say "some" and not "all," because only left-wingers can make sweeping generalizations about their opponents and pretend to have the evidence to back them up.

xxxxx xxxxxx
Junior
International Relations


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08 February 2007

You don't get it

Hey...I want you to know that it's OK if you don't get it. I mean really, you don't have to get it, and that's fine. What is it? Don't you have to know what it is to know if you've got it or not? Maybe. But whatever it is, whether you have it or not, that's OK. You should know that. At least that's OK for me. You don't have to get it to be my friend. Maybe if this was high school I'd have been a prick towards you. And I still might be, but pray not just because you don't get it. This also means you don't have to pretend like you get it either. Maybe it's quite plain you don't get it; that's great. But if you ever feel the need to act like you've got it, just stop. I mean, quite seriously, knock it off. You don't get it. I know it, you know it. And that's alright. Really, it is, it's OK if you don't get it. Tell me. Or at least just don't act like you've got it. 'Cause you don't. We've discussed this. Want to know why that's OK? Want to know why that doesn't change a thing between you and I, this not getting it business? I'll tell you -- I don't get it either. Wow, I know. 'But, for so long, you got it...' No, I didn't. Maybe I did, but I don't anymore. I probably pretended to get it a whole lot. I don't always remember. But I don't have it now. Nor do you. Which it great, because maybe we can help each other get it. Maybe we can just sit back and experience one another getting it. You can tell me, 'I don't get it,' and I'll tell you, 'I don't get it,' and off we'll go not getting it together.

Because think with me how great it will be when we do get it.

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